Feedback is a powerful tool. Many of us remember feedback from our earliest school days – perhaps we were praised for doing well in a certain subject, or told we were too easily distracted, or that we were quiet, or loud, or sporty, or musical. School reports are often our first formal taste of feedback, and they can have a lasting influence.

We continue to receive feedback from friends, family, colleagues or bosses as we move through life. Some of it is irrelevant, some painful to hear. Sometimes it’s so useful that we might change our jobs or goals as a result.

And yet, feedback at work can be patchy. Repeated surveys show that many employees don’t think they receive enough feedback, and that they’d like to get more.

Despite this, many managers and team leaders find giving feedback challenging. We worry that we will be too direct, or not direct enough, that we might hurt someone or provoke defensiveness or anger. Being on the receiving end can be just as daunting, as anyone who’s received a confidence-damaging workplace review can attest.

Fortunately, there are some great feedback frameworks that can smooth the process for givers and receivers alike. Here are a few that many teams like to use:

I like…/I wish…

This format is great for introducing feedback skills to a team. First, comment on something that you see a colleague or direct report doing well. Make it specific, not general. For example, “I liked how your attentive listening and people skills helped to defuse that tense meeting”, not “you were great in that meeting, well done!”

Next, ask for something you’d like to change, for example “I’d like it if you could spend more time planning our team schedule with me, your input is useful”. Try to frame it positively, and make it meaningful. Avoid bland statements like “I’d like you to keep doing what you’re doing”.

A good way to introduce this can be to divide into pairs and take turns exchanging “I like/I wish” statements with each other – this way everyone experiences both giving and receiving feedback, and starts to feel more doing so.

Stop, Start, Continue

This is a non-threatening way to reinforce great behaviours, discourage less helpful ones, and introduce some changes. It works as both a one-to-one feedback tool, and one to use with the whole team. You can keep it open, or choose a theme, such as a work project or your team’s ways of working. Begin by discussing what everyone is doing well and can continue doing, what isn’t going so well and could be stopped, and end with ideas for new behaviours or initiatives that you would like to start. Agree together which of the Stops, Starts and Continues you all want to take forward, and when you will review. If you’re using this one-to-one, it can help to make it a two-way exchange, so that it feels more equal. Making this a regular event – perhaps once every six months, or at the end of every project, will make it a normal part of your team’s process.

Feedforward

This method from author and coach Marshall Goldsmith avoids looking backwards, on the basis that critiquing past actions or events can spiral into a blame game and provoke defensiveness or withdrawal. Instead the focus is squarely on the future.

The most common format is in small groups of three to four people. One person presents a question, such as “I’d like to be a better listener”, or “I’d like to make the next sales event more profitable than the last one”. The others listen carefully and then each make two to three helpful suggestions of how this could be achieved. The ‘questioner’ doesn’t critique the suggestions, but listens closely before thanking each person for their ideas. It’s up to the questioner whether they use the suggestions or not.

This method is as much about advice and ideas as it is about feedback. Its value lies in demonstrating how to ask clearly and simply for support, and how to listen without reacting.


Ask for feedback

One of the best ways to encourage a stronger feedback culture is to be a manager or leader who solicits feedback regularly – perhaps using one of the tools above. The more that your teams see you requesting and listening to feedback, the more natural it becomes to share feedback with each other. Research also suggests that feedback we’ve asked for feels less threatening than unsolicited feedback. Keep your feedback request specific and timely. For example, at the end of a team meeting, ask “How well did I do just then on balancing my speaking with listening?”. Small feedback requests like these are easier to process, and model the kind of feedback loops that can become part of your team’s way of working.

Start small and with positive intent, and invite your team to suggest any feedback frameworks that they might like to try. Treating it as a collective endeavour encourages equality between managers and teams, and takes away some of that ‘school report’ feeling. Aim for a point where people feel comfortable sharing what’s working well, and what would be ‘even better if’, and you’ll be off to a great start.

Read:  Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen

Watch: Marshall Goldsmith on Feedforward

Read online: Build a feedback culture by Gustavo Razzetti

Rebecca Alexander
Executive Coach rebecca@coaching-studio.co.uk